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Rant: Don’t Wait for Someone to be Mr Perfect
28 March 2019
There’s a misconception out there that the right partner will be perfect.
Perfect does not exist. I once had a lady leave me a very angry comment on a Facebook post I made saying this exact thing.
No one is wonderful enough to never trigger your internal hurt.
I see so many posts online of single women who believe they are very special and the right guy will see it and behave accordingly.
Yes, you are very special, but no one can ever live up to appreciating you and being ‘on’ and tending to your needs 24/7.
A healthy relationship will trigger you and that’s ok, it simply highlights where you need to do work on yourself.
You must identify what hurts you have brought with you into the relationship from your past, so you don’t sabotage it.
We sabotage relationships in various ways and wanting Mr Perfect is another form of sabotage.
(This is different than a significant other purposefully hurting you - this is emotional and psychological abuse and should never to be tolerated).
If you have been cheated on in a previous relationship then you may be constantly looking for evidence of it happening again your new relationship.
Or if someone doesn’t respond to your text within 20 minutes it means he’s not Mr Perfect.
Heal what hurt you by taking a break between relationships to ensure you don’t take residual negative feelings with you.
I know I have caused some stressful moments for my husband early in our relationship because he couldn’t understand why I needed so much reassurance.
Because he didn’t need the reassurance himself he didn’t see that I needed it.
That’s ok because we both have different life experiences. All it took was a 1 -
conversation where we both communicated from the heart to truly understand each other.
If I had expected him to be perfect, then I would have dumped him and said this guy doesn’t care about me and try to find someone who fits my idea of perfect.
Unless you’re perfect you can’t ask someone else to be. And no one is perfect.