The thought of your ex being intimate with someone else is agonizing. You can’t sleep; you can’t eat in fact you feel like you can barely function. The good news is that you are not alone. Other people are feeling exactly the same way as you.
Your relationship is not different to many others and you will find a way through this.
Firstly, they are likely to be on the rebound. A rebound, by definition, is anyone your ex pushes himself or herself on to straight after breaking up with you. It’s a relationship to help them heal and move on. It’s unlikely to last. So why do they do it? Well because they miss you.
Remember. This new person isn’t you. They may have certain qualities that your ex enjoys but it won’t be the same as being with you. Don’t worry about the things you can’t control. Stop focusing on what he is doing with her and focus on what you are doing for you.
Restrict the time that you allow yourself to think about and talk about your ex to a maximum of 30 minutes a day. If you find your mind wandering at other times stop and do something else. Find things that interest you that you can focus on instead. Be conscious of all the time you are enjoying without your ex. Be grateful for all these new opportunities and experiences.
Intentionally think about your ex during your allotted time, think about it until you become bored of it. Speak to friends about how you are feeling but don’t bore them by going over the same ground over and over. Instead, involve them in the new activities you are doing and your new focus on making yourself happy.
Your ex will move on and create a new life for himself whether you like it or not. So don’t wallow in self-pity go out there and create your own future. Celebrate and be grateful for the good aspects of your relationship but be prepared to make new memories and create a new normal.
Members, if you’ve recently gone through a break-up and would need a little extra tender love and care and help to navigate the grieving process head over to our Healing After a Break-Up Mini eCourse in the member's area.